More on Chronic Sorrow....

Yes more depressing stuff - but hey it may just help someone out there understand that what they are feeling comes with the territory.

Again a lot of what is written here is quoted directly from the "Dealing with the Feelings - Coping with your child's disability" booklet as per last post.

HOW DOES CHRONIC SORROW AFFECT PEOPLE?

In a word, differently! But some of the more common feelings are:

FEELING GUILTY
Many parents find it hard to admit to thenselves or each other that they are grieving abou their chil's disability. To do so seems like a betrayal of their child, as if they would love them more if they were "normal". They may feel guilty about their feelings of resentment or longing that things could be different.

LOOKING FOR SOMETHING OR SOMEONE TO BLAME
They may search for something or someone to blame in an attempt to make sense of what has happeneed. Where there isnt an obvious reason, parents may blames themselves either rationally or unrationally

FEELING ANXIOUS
Every parent feels anxious about their child's wellbeing and safety, but when your child has a disability they are more vulnerable.
Having a child with a disability can make people feel anxious for another reason too. Suddenly they are dealing with difficult, relentlessly stressful issues. They might feel out of control of their life and become anxious about what else might be in store for them and/or their child or they may feel like they can never truly relax.

LIFE IS UNPREDICTABLE
For parents who like to have a strong sense of being in control of their lives this inability to manage their life can feel very stressful.

FEELING NUMB
Some people deal with very painful feelings by shutting down emotionally. They function best by keeping a lid on strong feelings of sadness, anger or fear.

NEEDING TO FIND MEANING
The Why us, why our child, why has this happened thinking.

FEELING BITTER AND CHEATED
Many parents feel like they have been cheated - that they have been dealt an unfair hand....

FEELING ALONE
Parents sometimes feel like they are under siege, standing all alone with their back against a wall. In a world designed for "normal" people, whrer their family life is very different, such parents often feel very alone.

Well next week will be a bit more positive with some keys to coping............